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Vol 879 - Feb. 21, 2010 - Dictionary For Women
Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -
Time for something NEW - we never disappoint!
Trapped at the office waiting for happy hour can be a snoozefest. No more. The Toilet Paper is daily email newsletter delivers the most shocking quotes, stats, facts, and lists about one noteworthy news topic each day. Laser sharp, bust out funny, and not afraid to cross the line. Sign up to make this happy hour part of your routine.
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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?
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Strange "Insults With Class!"
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." -- Forrest Tucker
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -- Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." -- Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -- Oscar Wilde
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." -- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." -- Billy Wilder
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -- Winston Churchill
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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Dictionary For Women
DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN
Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n.
A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he hasn't realized it yet.
Airhead (er*hed) n.
What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman.
Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n
You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but, he "made the dinner."
Blonde jokes (blond joks) n.
Jokes that are short so men can understand them.
Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n
Gotta get married in a church.
Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n.
An appliance designed to eat socks.
Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n.
A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut M&Ms.
Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n.
The last two minutes of a football game.
Exercise (ex*er*siz) v
To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.
Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n.
What you spend ˝ an hour writing, then forget to take to the store.
Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n.
Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See "Magician."
Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n
Similar to a black hole in space -- if he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime soon.
Childbirth (child*brth) n.
You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus,...breathe...push..."
Lipstick (lip*stik) n
On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear...!
Park (park) v./n.
Before children, a verb meaning, "to go somewhere and neck." After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and slide.
Patience (pa*shens) n.
The most important ingredient for dating, marriage and children. See also "tranquilizers."
Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n.
Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.
Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n
A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card.
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Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix
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STRANGE OLDE FAMILY PICTURE - STRANGE FAMILY TREE - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/160079.html
CARS YOU WILL NEVER SEE AGAIN - 1951 STUDEBAKER CHAMPION - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/160365.html
NEW HOOVER DAM BRIDGE BYPASS PROGRESS - 3 - http://www.strangevacations.com/content/item/160476.html
GBU-57 A/B - MOTHER OF ALL MOTHER OF ALL BOMBS! - http://www.strangecollege.comcontent/item/160505.html
WWII - THE ILL FATED FLYING JEEP EXPERIMENT - http://www.strangeamericans.com/content/item/160531.html
STRANGE OLDE PICTURES - MADONNA - 1976 - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/160549.html
STRANGE SNOW TRAX QUAD - http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/160560.html
THE FINE ART OF TOILET PAPERING A HOUSE - PERFECTED! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/160561.html
GLOBAL WARMING? FROZEN WATERFALL & RIVER !!!! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/160563.html
RECORD SNOWFALL RESULTS IN WORLDS LARGEST SNOW FORT! - http://www.strangeblondes.com/content/item/160564.html
SCUBA DIVER GETS HIGH FIVE FROM WHALE PAL! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/160565.html
F-16 - FIGHTING FALCON - 100,000 HP ROCKET! - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/160566.html
2010 OLYMPICS ICE SKATING DANGERS - SKATING FALLS & SLIPS! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/160593.html
STRANGE WINTER VEHICLES - HUGE WHEELS - FRONT SKI! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/160597.html
STRANGE OLDE STAGECOACH BUS - PACKED! - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/160598.html
F-4 PHANTOM CRASH TEST - FULL SPEED INTO A WALL - 1 - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/160605.html
STRANGE MEHDI PATTERNS - TEMPORARY SKIN DECORATION FOR WEDDINGS & FESTIVALS - SOUTHEAST ASIA - http://www.strangemedical.com/content/item/160667.html
STRANGE HEARTS IN NATURAL FORMATIONS - ISTHMUS - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/160682.html
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The Featured Pix Category This Week - SV - CONCEPT CARS - WILD DESIGNS - GM - FORD - CHRYSLER - JAPANESE - EUROPEAN
http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/category/100707_1.html
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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week
Strange Sports Announcements on British TV - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/160501.html
- Ever Wonder About Our English Language? - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/24193.html
- Brainteasers - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/content/item/23970.html
- Great 'Test' For Those Over 30! - How'd You Do? - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/23657.html
- Are You Mensa Material? - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/23531.html
-Your Personality Determined By Which Gift You Choose - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/24161.html
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The Featured New Category This Week - College - University - High School - Teacher/Prof
http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/110_1.html
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Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent New Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites
New! --------------- NEW STRANGE WEBSITES!-------------------
Old Pictures & Images - History - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/
Farmers - Crops - Tractors - Farm Animals - http://www.strangefarmer.com/
Racing! - F1 - NASCAR - Dirt Bikes - http://www.strangeracer.com/
Blondes - Celebs - Models - Musicians - http:www.StrangeBlondes.com/
-----------NEW -------------New! ---------------New! ----------
Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/
Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/
Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/
Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/
Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/
All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/
Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/
Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/
Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/
Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/
Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/
Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami’s - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/
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Time for something NEW! - We never disappoint!
Trapped at the office waiting for happy hour can be a snoozefest. No more. The Toilet Paper is daily email newsletter delivers the most shocking quotes, stats, facts, and lists about one noteworthy news topic each day. Laser sharp, bust out funny, and not afraid to cross the line. Sign up to make this happy hour part of your routine.
IT'S STRANGE! CHECK IT OUT - CLICK ON THIS LINK!
http://www.thetoiletpaper.com/?ref=30215
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